How do you beat Andy Murry at tennis? KILL HIM!

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why did the man beat his wife? why not?

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What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

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Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Jay-Z

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a guy on the street throws a boy between 2 priests

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Why did the camel cross the road? He was off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of OZ.

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How many jewish people can you fit in a Volkswagen? depending on the class of car but a mid range SUV can seat up to seven.

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What do you call a hairy pussy? A cat.

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So I was walking along the beach one day and I see this whale. Then this dolphin named Lennie came up and was like, "Hey whale, how've you been? I haven't seen you in a while." And the whale was like, "Sorry, but I can't talk to you." And Lennie was like, "Whyever not?" And the whale said, "Because I'm not a starfish!"

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what did Stan say to Dave? nothing, Dave died 500 years before Stan was born, thus he said nothing.

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Q: How do you kill a goblin if the fries are next to the sushi? A: Yes. Walruses have nostrils and rubber chickens don't like microwaves!

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two mormons missionaries knock on a door they are welcomed into the home and treated with kindness later the family is baptized. the mormons return home with a sense of accomplishment and purpose.

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Why does fowlerville suck cause everyone wishes they were black

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I didn't get to ask. He got hit by a car.

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Why does Michael J. Fox always have his martinis shaken? He thinks they taste better that way.

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Paris Hilton spend 2 whole days in the slammer due to possesion of narcotics. I would have gotten 20 to life... no... it's not funny...

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Why did Bruno Mars explode? He caught a grenade for ya.

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why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

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how many black guys goes it take to screw inalightbulb? just one, but inalightbulb was feeling rather slutty today, so 2.

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A blind man walks into a bar. He backs up, takes two steps to the right, and walks around the bar rubbing his forehead.

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How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

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How do you get rid of black elephants? Arrest it for being black.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting a handjob from Edward scissor hands

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops