Why didn't the Irishman walk into the bar? Beacause he had killed himself the previous night as a result of his alcoholism.

What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

What happened to the alcoholic? He got liver cancer

Person 1: want to hear a joke? person 2: yes.

What is the hardest thing about eating a vegetable? the wheelchair

What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

roses are red violets are blue I have a knife stand by the door

An invisible man sleeping in your bed! Who ya gunna call? Most likely the local police department to report the strange incident possibly brought on by lack of sleep. NOT Bill Murray.

Whats bent but straight for danielle? Joseph Plummer

i killed my family

I love you more than other things that are significantly less important to me than you are

What's sadder then a dead puppy? 2 dead puppies.

How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

Don't make jokes about the Holocaust. My grandfather died in the Holocaust. He fell off a watchtower.

Don't you hate it when you have 5 dead bodies, and you don't know which one to shoot your load on? -no

Q. What did the gay kid say to his group of straights? A. 10 dollars to the first one to tip over that little asian boy on the bike.

What's worse than finding a work in your apple? The Holocaust.

What's the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes people laugh and the other is a clown.

Jack and Jeff went up a hill to fetch a pail of water, They both turned gay, and had some sex, and now they have HIV

What did the paralyzed kid get for his 18th birthday? A boner.

What do you call an asian who celebrates Christmas? A christan

What did Stevie Wander get for christmas? A book

There once was a man from Nantucket. He was among thousands of men who were also from Nantucket.

Why did the little boy cry? Because he was badly burnt in a house fire.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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