Romney: I think you would raise our debt and make more Americans jobless. Obama: It's just cuz I'm black!

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waiter! waiter! theres a fly in my soup! the waiter immediately retrieved a new soup and gave them a 50% discount for the misshap.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are polemicists.

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Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

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How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

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What do you get when you combine lemons, sugar and water? Lemons, sugar, and water

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why was 6 afraid of 9? because 7 ate 9 and 6 is afraid of ghosts

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Knock Knock........wait there cars gone, I'll come back later

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Fuck off, seriously, if your name is Tifa, my name is bah, I got better things to do.

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-How do you kill a douche? -You stab him untill he cries out in mercy and stops moving.

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Q: Why can't dinosaurs talk? A: Because they're all dead.

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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How do you get a baby to stop crying Cut its head off

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A man from timbuktu slept on a bed of nails. It was very uncomforable

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What did the sun say to the moon ?? Nothing - they can't speak

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Knock knock who's there? Boo. Boo who? Uh, Boo Johnson, your next door neighbor. Forget it I'll come another day.

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whats blue and fluffy? blue fluff.

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There are 3 types of people, those that can count and those who can not.

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What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

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What's worse than eating poop for your whole life? Nothing really, you've got serious problems if you have another option...

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When life gives you lemon, Squeeze lemon juice in life's eyes Rape it And demand oranges

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"I know it. I can feel it in my nuggets." -Chicken Joe

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Several ways to annoy people: Grab the end of their shirt to blow your nose Try to shove a bowling ball down there throat Try to sell them a broom and vacuum Try to eat their babies paint their toe Nibble their ankles Ask if you can babysit their crystal and if they say no start whining Carry around your chicken and ask if they want a nugget

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troll lololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololol.olo90ololol.o.ool.olololol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.o.o.lol.ol.ol.ol.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops