Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, I died because I didn't have a heart.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a skeleton in your closet? Evidence of a brutal crime. You should probably call the cops.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why didn't Michael Jackson celebrate his birthday? He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, He cracked his skull and died on impact. He will be missed.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A black man walks into a bar and a white man says "we don't allow coloured men in here". the black man sighs and walks out, wondering what he ever did wrong, and makes his way to the liqour store, to buy some beer to drown his sorrows over his mothers death. On the way, a racist white man shoots and kills him. Then, at his funeral, someone makes the joke "Wow, how ironic. The black guy was the victim.."

thumb_up thumb_down +21

so a jewish man walks into a bar. He looks at the bartender and says...this better be free

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the man cry... He got hit with a fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. Except when I said muffins I meant Jews. .. I guess it really isn't that funny anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What happens when an old lady bumps into a black man in the middle of the night? He politely offers her help getting home and she accepts.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What are annoying? Ads.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

http://www.com/

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

when debbie meets downer

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why couldn't the prostitute give a proper blow job..... She had no lips

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock Knock Who's there A girl scout want to buy some cookies to raise money for my cardiac surgery?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did Chuck Norris's calendar go from March 31st to April 2nd? There was a misprint

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy! But here's my switchblade Get in the trunk.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A Muslim, a Jew and a Christian are on an airplane talking about religion. The Jew tells the Christian he believes in a single holy entity. The Christian says he believe Christ is the Son of that very same entity. The Muslim says "When can I get out of this room?" because he's been detained at the airport due to religious profiling.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What hurts more than a bee sting? Child birth.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car, Robin.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops