What has equally bad consequences as breaking someone's leg in front of the local authorities? Breaking your own leg on purpose in front of the local authorities.

Today, both my parents were killed in a car accient. FML.

What did the banana say to the apple? We're fruity.

knock, knock who's their? police get down on the ground!

A white man walks into a bar. He orders an alcoholic beverage, and thinks to himself, " that made me feel a lot better. He drives home in his Cadillac and takes a nice sleep until 7am, when he is supposed to work. He is an architect.

Q. What do you call a blonde in a library? A. Lost.

Roses are red Violets are blue i have a gun get in the van

two snow men standing in a field and one says to the other can you smell carrots

guess what im a bitch i have no balls and i can slap your mum in the face

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The Ambulance. Ambulance who? Sir, we're going to need you to come down to the hospital, your son is dead.

what did mickee utley say to micheal bane cnb

Do they censor Ass? TESTING TESTING ASS ASS ASS

Two tomatoes where crossing the road, when one of them barely avoided being run over. The other said, come on tomato!

STOP BULLYING FAT PEOPLE. They have enough on their plate

a disabled man takes a walk in a park

A bar walked into a bar. Bars can't walk.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

what did timmy from southpark say after his warther melested him? TIMMY

PENIS that is all

why does paul mccartney not wear shoes? cause a nigga stole it

What's an anti joke? Then I ate my digestive biscuit.

Just friends, they too pretend to be you and copy the way you write and express yourself, I told them to stop though, Azure threatened someone here a cultist of sorts I think, that does not exactly put us in a better light with the people that where getting our messages, and yes they are coded, I sincerely had no idea though,

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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