What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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What did the Mexican guy say to the black guy? What? Nothing, he don't speak English

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A blind man walks past a fish market then says "why hello lady's" ????

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Why did the chicken go to KFC? Because it was suicidal.

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What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

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What's worse than biting into a worm in your apple? Being run over by a stampede of elephants

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How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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I don't always browse the internet. But when i do i prefer Anti Joke.con

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

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Q:If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is here to hear it, will it make a noise A:That Philosopher probably had a lot of herbal tea in the morning

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Doctor: I'm sorry about your disease, young man. It looks like your time is up. Man: NO! How much time to I have? Doctor: Five. Man: Five years? Five months? Five weeks? Doctor: Four... Three...

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How many black people does it take to screw In a lightbulb.....I can't see them.

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Yeah, "master hypnotists" (and do not even get me started on hypnotherapists, they completely suck!) keep claiming that you need to keep up to date with the "constantly developing art of hypnosis" The thing is though, that hypnosis does not develop itself, people develop it further, and when the key ingredient is actually believing things under a certain state, you can do anything, even slow the passage of time to a halt. Once I tried that, I was disappointed when I figured out that it did not work, so I went shopping (for groceries), then realized that no time had passed at all, sounds like bullshit, and yeah I wont be trying that again anytime soon, lucid dreaming is good enough, you can spend hours and hours in a lucid dream state, days, and then wake up and figure out you slept like two hours or something.

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What did the man say to g**guy we are both g**

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I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

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Roses are red They can be white too Violets are not blue They are violet

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Women's Rights

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9/11.

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i am a dino. RAWR.

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What direction do 5 gay guys walk? I am unable to answer that because they are all aspiring to work in different occupational fields.

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What's red and looks like blue paper? Red paper

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A Priest, a Rabbi and a Shaman walk into a bar. The Bartender looks at them and says "What is this a Joke?"

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What's the difference between you and a bucket of shit? The bucket and the shit. You're a human being.

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What happened to the man who jumped off a plane while riding a donkey? He died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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