whats thin, long and hard? A: a pen is

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What did the man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Oh my goodness! Are you alright?!"

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she is legally blind

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says: both your legs are broken in 10 places, you will never walk again.

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How do Helen keller's parents punish her? They sternly reprimand her for her misdeeds.

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Whats worse than getting raped by jack the ripper? Getting fingered by captain hook.

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he can make before the car hits him.

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Why did the Mexican jump the fence? Because he didn't feel like walking around the house to the side where the gate was to get out of the backyard

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Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

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This is a haiku A lovely type of poem It's snowing on Mt. Fuji

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Why did the girl scream for help? She was being raped.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Slavery.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to form the basis of an extremly popular jokewhich would grace the schoolyards around the world for centurys to come!

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A man in a wheelchair walked into a bar. No he didn't.

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Knock knock, Who's there? The police, you have committed 14 major felonies and you are being arrested.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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As far as I know, the day after tomorrow is going to be YOUR lucky day, because you will be tasting sausage for the first time with your lower lips... No seriously, you cant be virgin, you can tell me the truth, you like 24 or something?

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Yo momma is so ugly, that your father can no longer stand her. They are getting divorced.

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'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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Whats the difference between a quarter and a penny? 24 cents.

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Two pies where sitting in a oven when one of the pies says: God damn it's hot in here. The other pie screams out loud: HOLY SHIT A TALKING PIE!

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What do friends and trees have in common? They will both fall over after being hit multiple times with an ax.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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