How do you make a baby stop crying? Make it smell its own diaper then, drown it in its own tears.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have Somthing To tell you F*** You

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a good, New England family man

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Why did the black person eat fried chicken Because fried chicken tends to be an abundant food in the African American community and that was the quickest and cheapest weekend afternoon food source nearest to his house. It is also found in many other communities throughout the country and even the world. Oh yeah, he was hungry

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What do Whitney Houston and MTV have in common? They both REALLY died in the 90's.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Heroshima

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Q: How do you shoot blue flames from your hands? A: You start to duck and lean forward quickly before you fully reach to duck as you punch as hard as you can, a blue flame should come out as Japanese bullshit automatically spews out of your mouth. It should not take more than a try or two...

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing. I don't know. Why? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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How do you make a clown stop laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a turkey, idiot.

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Matthew Wyckoff

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What is BIG, STIFF, AND FULL OF SEMEN!!!? A SUBMARINE!!!!!!!

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roses are red violets are blue daffodils are yellow pansies are pink

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Q. What does the pencil and the basketball have in common? A. They both are made from wood, except for the basketball.

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Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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One, two, three, four and five

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How did the black kid get in school? By taking the bus.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Relizing its a used tampon covered with blood.

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Roses are red They can be white too Violets are not blue They are violet

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What does an Irishman say to you in the morning? Nothing because you only speak French.

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Roses are red Violets are blue We decapitated some little children Now I'm in jail too.

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How do you make Yoda sad? Kill all of his friends.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops