When life gives you ponies... get a new life!

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What is short and yellow? Most Asians

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What did the man say to the butterfly? To the butterfly? Nothing. He was probably talking to himself.

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What did the jew say to the black man? Nothing they were in a mall that got invaded by evil trees.

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Why did the kid drop his ice-cream? Because he tripped on a dead guy!

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What do you call a black man called Jermaine? Jermaine!

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Q. What did the mockingbird say to the blue jay? A. I mock you by mocking you

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What do you call a dog with 4 legs? A dog.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits

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If a tree falls in the forrest and a women hears it does it make a sound? Why is there a tree in the kitchen.

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Getting up, the 2nd hardest thing in the morning.

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Yo mama so fat she has more chins than the Chinese phone book. A.V.T was here Fred.

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What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

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Know who had straight parents? Adolf Hitler.

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Where did Wendy decide to work for her part time job? TACO BELL

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Why didn't the millionaire jump off the Golden Gate Bridge? He said "I don't have to commit suicide, that's for poor people" (Wyndellberg)

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How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb? None, any dog aware of the situation would kindly inform its owner.

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

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you know whats better than lemonade? sex

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them

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Your mamma's so fat she has been called morbitally obese

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What do you call a man with no arms and half an eye? Larry -Jack Sparrow

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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An man was tested positive for HIV. He then called his girlfriend and told her she should get tested.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops