What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu? If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment.

What do black people and tables have in common? Nothing.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

What would you call the baby of an elephant and a rhinoceros? Nothing. They are two entirely different species and therefore cannot breed.

why did the chinese man die because someone shot him

Yo mama so fat! Really she should get on an exercise program and watch her diet, as she is at higher risk for diabetes and other health issues

A man realizes the whole time he has wanted to fly like a bird. His funeral was two weeks later

Why was the black guy sad? Because he has a knife through his throat

Hey I just met you you are a sneaker smell my gym socks and then pick oot throughyour nose

Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

One Direction has 12 letters. So does gayyyyyyyyyy. Coincidence? I think not.

Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because it wasn't a pilot it was a toaster.

RACIST JOKE: how to start a footrace in ghana role a donut down a hill

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf, any situation with her in the drivers seat of a car would have serious implications.

What did the Black women tell her Asian boyfriend in bed Nothing because they don't talk when they are sleeping

A bomb went off in japan where did sally go Everywhere

There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. So now he's dead. No more eating of shoes.

What was so incredible about this bigger new oven i just bought? It could fit twice as many Jews in it. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

what’s worse than 12 dead babies in one trash can? one dead baby in 12 trash cans

What's the worst part of being a black Jew? That is a very uncommon combination of race and religion, therefore causing obvious confusion.

a man checks his mypsace

BBW BABY IS THE BEST BETTER THAN THE REST WELL EXCEPT MILF BABY. SUBSCRIBE TO BigHDGuns

When ducks fly in a V formation do you know why one side is longer than the other? Because there are more ducks on that side.

When an anvil and a feather are dropped off a building the anvil will hit the ground first because it's heavy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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