Why did the plane crash? Because, it's pilot was a bagel.

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Q: Why are black people so tall? A: Not all black people are tall, and if they are it is probably from their specific genes.

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I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

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How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

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Why did the Asian man have to sit down to pee? Because he had no legs.

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How fast can you paint a fence with babies? Depends how fast you can throw them.

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Hey man. what? squidbillies.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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What is better then fisting? Fisting with a metal studded glove

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Roses are red, violets are blue shut the hell up, and sit the hell down

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Taxes are like prostitutes. The higher your salary, the more you pay.

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what do all elephants have in common? they are all monkeys

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Why did the chicken cross the road? They had a sale on dresses on the other side.

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what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

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What is a slave fighting in a pit of Rome? Just a slave. Who cares?

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I was going to tell a joke about your mom's vagina, but that's overused.

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Why did the arm-less Ben fall off the swing? Gravity

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? the redneck got to him first.

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A man walks into a bar, he realizes he has no money and leaves

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Did you know Hellen Keller had a swingset? No I didn't. Ya it was actually really nice.

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I was watching two muffins baking in an oven. One said to the other, "Wow, it's hot in here." The other one said "Wow! A talking muffin!" I went to my psychiatrist the next day, to increase the dosage on my medication.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops