Two men are making sandwiches, one man is spreading peanut butter over the bread and the other man is spreading honey and Italian raspberry jam over rye bread. the man with the peanut butter sandwich looks over and says "HEY, where did you get the rye bread?" and the man with the rye bread says "well my wife made it yesterday and I would be delighted if you come over for some tea, and tried some of my wife's homemade rye bread".

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Two cows are sitting in a bathtub. One cow says please pass the soap. The other cow says nothing, cause it's a cow, making it incapable if speech. The other cow was just a guy in a cow costume.

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The day after Christmas a chain-smoker, a sex addict, and an alcoholic go to the doctor. The doctor tells the three friends that they need to quit their addiction or they will die. R.I.P. Tommy, Jacob, and Winston 1/1/2011

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A priest and rabbi walk into a bar. The priest leaves because they don't have wine.

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A vodka please Sir this is McDonald's Ok sorry, a McVodka please

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Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour.

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What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

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Why did the shrimp refuse to share? Because he was a little shellfish.

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who has a vagina, likes men , soundslike afive year old girl, has some sweet boobies and onlyhas one hair on his little vag? Robert sweeny

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Your mom is so fat she weighs significantly higher then most females of her age and height.

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Why did the dog bark? Because he wanted to.

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Was the last joke funny? Because this one isn't.

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A boy called Justin bieber fell down a hole and died

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Ask me if im an Airplane. Are your Airplane? Hell yes

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Q: When do u know when your sister is on her period? A: Your dads dick tastes funny.

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the reason why waldo is hiding from chuck norris is because they are playing hide and seek.

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Some say Helen Keller can't write a good book. You know what she said? Nothing.

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Where does Charlie Sheen buy his clothes? Winners

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Why did old Mary fall off the cliff? There were no brakes on her wheelchair

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what is the ??? crust^2 + Cool Whip

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What do you call a fish with 6 legs? A fish with 6 legs.

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What's clear, glass-like, and makes your brain feel like it's exploding just by smelling it? Crystal Meth

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Why did I deleted brian from my friend list ? Cuz he had brain tumor.

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A black man is sitting in front of the bus Then he respectfully gives up his seat to an elder woman

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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