Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

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What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

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What did the single guy do on Valentine's Day? Celebrate his birthday since he was born on the same day.

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How many women does it take to ski across the pit of lava? None, they would burn and die.

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Q: What's blue and yellow all over? A: A baby at the bottom of the pool with a slashed floatie. Q: What's red and yellow all over? A: A floatie at the top of a pool with a slashed baby.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Why do Jews fast for Yom Kippur? It's part of their tradition.

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A wife says to her husband "Everybody's coming over tonight, I want you to dress nice." *logically this cannot happen because there is no way that this couples residence can fit all 6 or so billion people in the world, nor would they want to.

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What do you call two mexicans playing basketball? A good example of friendly competition.

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Why did the husband and wifes marriage fail? The husband slept with many other women and is putting his family through a hellacious situation.

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What did Goldilocks say to the Three Bears? No one knows. Her remains were discovered three weeks later.

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How do you drown a blonde. Put a Scratch N Sniff at the bottom of a pool and tell her to sniff it.

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What do you call the birth of George Lucas? Terrible, abdominal pain for his mother.

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Why was the man white? Because he wasn't black. All credit goes to Caravel.

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger! Wrong. What doesn't kill you could leave you in a parapledgic state.

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A car with three black people in it is driven off a cliff and everyone dies. Why is this a tragedy? Because it is always a tragedy when human life is lost.

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If George Washington was the first president, and Barack Obama is the latest, how old is my grandma?

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Yesterday, upon the stair, I met a man who wasn't there. I saw him there again today; I've been sectioned. [L]

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

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What did the black guy say to the white guy running off the cliff? Watch out! You're running off a cliff!

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What do you call a remote that does not work? a remote that does not work.

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Why is Michael Jackson bad at checkers? Cause he's dead.

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I never made a mistake. I thought i did once but i was mistaken

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a man checks his mypsace

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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