Why does Gandalf have special powers? Because Dumbledore died.

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

Have you seen Stevie Wanders new house? No. Neither has he.

So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Four because snakes don't have legs.

What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

Q. What happened when a man went to a bar? A. Nothing, The bar was closed.

Why couldn't Sophie brush her hair? She had leukemia

Miškinis gerai prikolina.

Whats black and hangs from my tree? A slave

What's grey and can't swim? A castle.

How did young Austin get home while walking on the side of the street ? He didnt. He was hit by a car.

What's invisible and smells like carrots ? Rabbit Farts

Roses are red Violets are blue i have aides egg

What do you call a man in the desert? Whatever his name is.

How do you kill a blond? Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool.

What's worse than the holocost? 6 Million Jews

knock knock whos there steve i dont know you go away

A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

Roses are dead Violets are dead I'm a terrible gardener.

why did the baby cross the road i tied it to the back of a car

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because crossing through traffic is very dangerous

Why did the boy not wake up on time for school? He was fucking dead.

What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? A dead baby in 10 trash cans.

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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