A chinese man walks into a kitten store. He is a nice man in search of a companion.

Tony Soprano walks into a diner

Why did the black man drop his weed Because he got shot

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

What's the difference between a poodle and a noodle? Scaboodle!

Knock Knock Who did that?

What did the three sixteen year old boys do to the homeless man late at night? Wished him a happy birthday and gave him a meal

Religion.

I hope your not allergic to bees Because your about to be attacked by a live tiger.

What is a taco made out of? A. Various ingredients ranging from cheese to sour cream.

What did the blind, deaf, retarded kid get for Christmas? Spoiled.

Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

How do you piss off a gypsy? Curse at him

Titanic with will smith. Girl: I wont ever let go of you. Leo: Drowns. Smith: Move your fat ass over girl, there is like room for me and fifthy kids there yo! Me: Bitch if you need to float on a piece of wood where six of us could fit, im gonna drown you.

Thre jews walk into a bar i lied it was a gas chamber

What's long hard and full of seman. A submarine.

Just happy you are back Nero, I have no idea what a proxy is but I am at my mum`s place, is everything alright between us now?

Why did the black kid die? He had cancer.

what do you call two arabs flying a plane? a pilot and a co-pilot

Steve Jobs is alive.

Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. John runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

Q: What did the banana say as it was being eaten? A: Nothing. Bananas are inanimate objects and therefore are incapable of talking.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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