When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

All the planets are named after gods Ours is named after dirt....

slaughter the mussies #EDL

When faced with an impossible question. I like to give, and maybe receive, an impossible, yet endearing, request/answer to the problem. Sex?

a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

What's worse than dividing by zero? Chuck Norris dividing your face!

The WNBA

what do you call a kid named kid. kid

What do you do when you see a person sleeping at a bus stop? You fart on their head

What's the difference between the son of a prostitute and Luke Skywalker? Luke knew who his father was.

so three men walk into a bar and one is a priest.

What came first, the chicken or the egg? This is a psychological question which the egg came from the chicken, but the chicken also came from an egg, so the world may never know exactly.

my friend said this website was funny, you know what i said?.... its really not!

A:Knock Knock B:It's open

Why did the woman spend all her time in the kitchen? For fear of her abusive husband.

Whats the difference between a Corvette and 1000 dead babies? I don't have a Corvette in my garage.

once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

The president is invited to a party at Bill's house. Suddenly the house catches on fire. Who survived? No one, they all died.

What did lil' Suzy do when she got home from school? She was violently mutilated by a bear then continually but raped by a man she met on the Internet. Needless to say, she had a great time. -Harrison

Cancer

Knock Knock Who's there? Sheriff Sheriff who? Sheriff Robinson your husband has died in a local car accident.

As he stood in her front yard with a boombox in the pouring rain, she leaned her head out the window with a smile and he was electrocuted.

Q.Whats the difference between a black guy and a bench? A.One is a human and the other is an inanimate object used to give people a rest.

What is worse than getting hit by a car? Getting hit by a truck

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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