"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. And that's when I found out my Uncle Ted was a cross-dresser.

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A baby seal walks into a bar... The bartender looks at it and says: too young.

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Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

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A man walks into a bar, and promptly leaves because he left his kid in the car.

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What do you call a person with no arms or legs rolling around in leaves? I don't know that seems like a highly improbable situation

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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Why did the duck cross the road? To get cream cheese.

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Want to hear an orphan joke? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents

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a fat kid walked up to me today at school and claimed he could do more pull ups than i. i found this very funny because i have known this boy since i was two months old, and he witnessed the day where i lost both of my arms to cancer.

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three people walked into a bar and there was a blackman,a jew,a white man and a nazi bartendor which ones did he shoot? The black and the jew and the white man

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women's rights

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Why was the school girl called a dork. Because a whale penis is called a dork, and she identically resembles a giant aquatic dick.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit.

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What happened to the chinese man who walked into a wall with a boner? He hurt himself.

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Whats blind and deaf? Hellen Keller.

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While teaching her second grade class, Mrs. Peets asks the class a question from last night's homework, "OK class, what did you get for number five, 5+12=?" A kid in the back raises his hand slowly. "Yes James?", said the teacher. The kid in the back says, "My dick is as hard as a rock, Mrs. Peets."

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There is something in my butt what is It. My thong

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What did the Banana say to the human. Nothing, because bananas are not capable of talking

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Mr. T watched "the notebook"

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Yo mama is so fat... she died due to type two diabetes.

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Why didn't the teenager go to high school? He was murdered

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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NO ONE LIKES RANGAS

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I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops