Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? I can cook a pizza.

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A man with glasses and a cane walks out if a clothing store and accidentally bumps into a woman, knocking his hat off "Can't you watch where you're going?" the woman asks. The man then slaps her, knocking her to the ground. He picks up his new designer fedora, and drives off in his $90,000 Cadillac. The woman, after dusting herself off, gets the guy's plates, convinces a few witnesses to testify against the man, and informs the authorities of an assault. He was later arrested for assault as well as pimping and soliciting sex. He is found guilty in a court of law and is sentenced to 2-5 years in prison, and is doled a hefty fine.

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How are baseball and the holocaust similar? They're both games, except for the holocaust

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A black man and a midget walk into a bar. They notice the beverages are unreasonably priced so they leave.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta pudding god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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how does cody get laid? he doesnt.

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Whats worse than getting shot in the foot? Watching each member of your family get shot in the foot.

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No soap radio

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Me: How can you tell if somebody's a Nazi? Friend: How? Me: Their killing people in a ghetto. Friend: My friend was shot in a ghetto. Me: So, does that make him a Jew? Friend: No, he was just killed in a big ass oven.

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Why did the small 12 year old run away which a chicken. He felt like it and he was carrying bread which the chicken was allergic to.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind, How about you?

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I think everybody should have a penis. Does that make me a bad feminist?

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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One Zebra and One Elephant was walking in the desert, the Zebra said its hot and the elephant said i know.

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Yo Momma so old, that she has arthritis.

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Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

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Why was Little Bobby sad? He just superglued Uranus to his forehead.

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Why did the american block the road? Because he just ate at Mc donalds.

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A man walks into a bar. He has had a tough day at work and unwinds with a beer. He goes home to his loving family. He makes love to his wife that night. It's good but not great.

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Why was the woman happy to give birth to a beautiful, healthy child? Just kidding, she had an abortion.

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Nero7 How are you doing? This is "Eliza" I hope I will be joining, but I cannot reach you by phone, please respond ASAP time is running out.

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What is the difference between a black man and a bench A bench can support a family of five

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What's something that really sucks? Having a homicidal cat on your chest.

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Mom: what does IDK, LY, and TTYL mean? Son: I don't know, love you, and talk to you later. Mom: OK, I'll ask your sister.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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