How do you fit 10 babies in a bowl? With a blender. How do you get them out of the bowl? You don't, you've already been arrested for multiple cases of infanticide.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why couldnt the man run because he had no legs

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I fantasize about having sex with a moose

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the man fall off his bike? Because he wasn't on a bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How many stripes are there on a policeman's socks? None, policemen must wear regulation plain black socks.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you take money from a Mexican? You don't because they have none.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why did the chicken cross the road i hate it when people ask questions they already know the answer to

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the police officer pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How many Jews can you fit into a car? Depending on the size of the car, you should be able to safely fit somewhere between 2 and 8.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

how do you get a black guy out of a tree? fried chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Stop procrastinating.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why wasn't Steve paying attention in class? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is funnier than an anti-joke? My SAT scores.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

KONY 2012

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Me and my family won courtside tickets to the World Finals basketball game! ...WNBA...

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you get when Justin Bieber mates with a beaver? Nothing, the species are too genetically different to produce offspring

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock knock. Knock knock. Knock knock. I'm hammering nails. Knock knock.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

a man walks in to a night club he can not danse so he just wachis pepol

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats black, white, and red all over? Hot sauce on a checkerboard.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops