What do you call a person in a morgue? Dead.

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Whats sorer than stubbing your toe? Stubbing your toe twice

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b

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A woman asked a man in an elevator, "Did you fart?" The man honestly replied, "Yes. I didn't expect you to notice because it was the puffy kind."

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A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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so a girl asks a guy: "if a tree falls in the forest, and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?" the guy responds: "trees dont grow in the kitchen, so you shouldnt be worried about it."

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Q:What is usually pink, brown or black, usually big and comes out smaller, which goes in and out of your mothers mouth? A: Could be lots of things really... Moral: But we all know what you imagined you sick bastard!

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Whats blue and flufft Answer: Blue Fluff

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there was a guy who had 2 horses... he entered them into races... they were rubbish... kept losing... so he entered them in 1 big race and said hed get rid of the loser... the horses made a plan to finish it at exactly same time... he heard them talking and said HOW DARE TALK

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what did one sandwich say to another sandwich? nothing, sandwiches cant talk

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Roses are Red, uh..uh..ahhhhh oh shit I just came that curse is true

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A couple of years back a went to chile for a day, I was then trapped underground for 70 days...

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What has four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill someone? A pool table.

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A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

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Why did the whale rape a guy? He wanted to see what would happen.

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Know knock Who's there The fat lady off her medicine ball Call 000

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What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating in mid air? Drop It Niggher!

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A rabbi and priest both go into a bar... and they each had a responsible number of drinks before walking home.

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How do you wake up lady GaGa? You po po po poker face!

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Jamie stegman liked doodle alot. Yummy he thought to himself as it entered his mouth.

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What do you call a Simon with no arms and legs? Simon

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25

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You're momma is so dumb, she has troubles passing her math unit and should seriously consider a math touter

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? "Robin, please, get in the Batmobile

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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