Why can't the black person drown? He is very well trained at swimming.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, and so do I.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Is that my bread? I sure hope so.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha...................... Wats so funny?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How did the hillbilly fix his PC? He brought it to Wal-Mart and got a diagnostics from an expert then installed anti virus software.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

whats the diffrence 2 gay people and 1 gay person? A 1 person diffrence

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

My friends new nickname is hawk-eye! He is a jackass...

thumb_up thumb_down +13

The continent of Africa is mired in corruption, poverty, food crises, disease, and the exploitation of its resources. Happy Kwanzaa

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the gay kid in high school say? I'm straight.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock Knock Come in! :)

thumb_up thumb_down +13

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

it's funny because it's funny

thumb_up thumb_down +13

So, there's three blondes. Two of them walk into a bar. The third one missed it.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what did the slave say to the slave owner i like your car

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the chicken cross the playground. He didn't. chickens are unsanitary to have in schools

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do Helen Keller and Beethoven have in common? They both died wondering what the hell their last words were.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops