Why does Santa live in the north pole? Because his spicy body fat keeps him warm.

Roses are red, violets are blue, your Mom is a fake, she adopted you!

Q: John eats 50 cany bars, eats 45, how many does he have now? A: Diabetes

Q: Why were minorities denied access to the bathroom? A: It was for employees only.

Queens Park rangers

Engage in a lively debate with a friend, and when they are about to stump you, respond to whatever they say next with "What does that have to do with the price of tea in China?"

TWO PADDIES PASS A PUB

What did the cancer patient say to the other cancer patient? Nothing, he was dead.

What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings

what porn does a nugget watch nugget porn.

How did the boy escape the burning building? He didn't. He burned and when to hell like everyone else.

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis. -Rivrawr

How do you tell if your boyfriend is gay? He is having sex with men

Men's rights

Why did the girl throw the clock out of the window? The clock was broken, and it was the only valuable object in her possession.

Why did the director call cut? Because he was shot dead by Nazis.

Knock knock whose there alzheimers alzheimers who get in the van

What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting Cancer.

Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? - Because she had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up again? - Because she had no legs. Why didn't anyone help her? - Because she had no friends. Knock knock. -Who's there? Not Sally.

If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

Knock knock Who's there? No one ever mentioned someone named "there" it's me, Jim

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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