What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Go die in a hole.

Why are aspirins white? Because the creator of aspirin didn't feel it necessary to color the pills.

Why did the man fall of his bicycle? Because someone threw a fridge at him

What did the blind girl say? Its dark in here.

How many vikings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Probably just one, though I'd imagine it hard to teach someone from the 9th century C.E. how to, let alone explain electricity.

What did the Beatrice do after she got kicked off of X Factor? she went to a nearby store and bought a slim jim

Are you Jamaican? Because your dreadlocked hair is an iconic symbol of one who would be from the country of Jamaica.

Whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp.

I was driving to Wal-Mart the other day and I saw a black man in a white Murcielago. I thought to myself that he must be doing good. Because everything he owns is white..... dick

Q: What is Kony's favorite rapper A: SOULJA BOY!!

What did the blond say to the ginger Stop drop and roll your hairs on fire

Why did I laugh at a joke? Cuz it was funny

Q: Why did the fork cross the balloon? A: Apples

Roses are Red Violets are Purple But nothing rhymes with purple.

What do you call a one legged , one eyed, canadian fisherman called Samuel Browning? Mr Browning unless you are on friendly terms then Sam is fine.

Knock knock who's there? the police, your under arrest the police your under arrest who? BAM! sir, I'm placing you under arrest for the murder of your wife, anything you say or do can be used against you. IT WASN'T ME!!!! yeah yeah tell it the judge

Why did the black guy stop drinking his kool-aid? He learned of its high sugar content and began to drink a glass of water as a healthier option.

One time at band camp, I advanced my clarinet skill, which led me to have a good life.

Why did the black man commit suicide? Because the white man murdered him.

What do you call a black man with mishap-in head scares on the left side of his face and a 3rd degree burns on the right side? a very unfortunate guy.

What is the biggest lie that's still close to the truth? You came out of your momma's asshole.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

Did you hear about the guy who got his whole left side cut off? Now he is dead..

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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