timmy has no arms knock knock whos there? NOT TIMMY!!!

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A man walks into a library looking for books on poor punchlines. The Librarian directs him to the appropriate section.

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what is red and lies on the floor? the boy that jumped out of the plane

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why did jimmy's mom fall off the cliff? i dont know.

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boobs!

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what sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? a baby combing its hair with a potato peeler

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What happened when the black woman moved to the front of the bus? There were no seats available but everyone was very nice about it. She also asked for gum. Somebody did have gum. Which was nice.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Rhetorical question.

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Want to hear what's totally out of this world? Not wasting a whole page of space for something that doesn't even vaguely resemble a joke. [L]

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Your mom is so old she is significantly more identifiable in a crowd of middle-aged men and women.

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nothing

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How did Bill Framex die? He didn't because he isn't real.

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“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

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Knock, knock No, I do not want to hear about God.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He was butchered on the farm for chicken fingers.

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What did the zombie say to the woman? I like turtles.

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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What's the difference between Josef fritsal and a fridge? A fridge can be thrown at a bowl of custard.

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Why does ISIS want guns? Because they wanted to kill. Duh.

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Why was Little Bobby sad? He just superglued Uranus to his forehead.

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Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

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What is blue and rolls ? A blue, rolling thing.

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All these jokes are so much funnier when I read them during class, laughing my ass off and everybody's looking at me like I'm retarded

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A black man, a Mexican man, a Jew, an Asian man, and a white man get into a fight. Who won? Well since their dispute got all the way to a fight, I guess nobody really wins.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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