What's the simularity between a eagle and a rock? They both fly, exept for the rock.

Read in a Jersey accent: SOOOOOO my friend __________ saw this coffee shop in new jersey! He was like.... i love coffee why dont they give it to me for free???? The man at the coffee shop Killed me! that is why coffee is not free!

What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because their both fruits.

Why did Michael Jackson become white? He thought he saw a ghost.

She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

2 men walk into a bar. You would have expected the second one to notice it after the first guy walked into it.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? 9/11

What's the richest fish in the sea? The one you threw a quarter at.

roses are red violets are blue What smells like poo? Your waffle's blue

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

if your were a slu* what would you do dance on a pole or get a tattoo

The asian boy only did an hour of study....... nothing was heard of him after his mum found out

If only i were a man! You not! Your a.... WO-MAN!

why did jonathan not get any presents for the holiday?because it was the 4th of July

James walks into a room he then leaves as the room is full of hot women but he does not find them attractive as he has a girlfriend and is also bisexual.

Ask me if I'm a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

the anti-joke.com joke was just like a normal joke. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

Q: Why did Jimmy not have balls? A: A terrible, terrible sand paper accident.

A Frenchman, an Irishman, and a Russian walk into a bar. The Frenchman orders a glass of wine, the Irishman orders a whisky, and the Russian, who prefers to be sober, orders a glass of water. They have an all-around pleasant night, yet they leave the bar upset. Why? A severe water contamination in the town resulted in the Russian man consuming a fatal dose of arsenic.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms and she was blind.

What did the 80 year old man do to celebrate valentines day with his wife? Nothing, Alzheimer's made him forget about Valentines day.....and that he was married. What did his wife do for Valentines day? Killed herself.

Woman:I give my Heart to You! Man:Thank You!!! The Woman then dies because one can't live without a heart

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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