How many apples come from trees? None, not a single one of em'

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Once upon a time, The end.

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what did the chinese man say to the convicts at the side of the road? so long gay boys what did the convicts do to the chinese man? nothing he was in a car

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Why did the man cut his hair? Cause he has cancer

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What do you call a man named Mark? Mark

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Tried to type an ascii of a penis, failed

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Why don't women have breasts? Because they have dandruff. Get it? Hint: "dandruff" = "dan druff"

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Why couldn't the blonde have kids? She had Ovarian Cancer.

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What did the boy and the dog do at the park? Nothing, the dogs dead

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Why was little Jessica missing?? She was stuck in the freezer.

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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What is a kangaroos favorite desert? The outback

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You're always working, why don't you spend some time with your daughter? be a good father. But i already am. We're sleeping together while you work every night.

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What is makes you more happy to see than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed up as a clown.

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? 17.

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Finding TWO worms in your apple.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Why do people carry around spoons? Because they like to do them

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Benny: Hi, my name is Benny, what's your name? A potato: ...

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Mom: Uncle toms coming home from the war Jimmy: What are we going to do Mom: Bury his coffin he hit a land mine .............. Jimmy: ^O^

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why did the Cow die....? He didnt!!!!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? An Alzheimers's patient. An Alzheimers's patient who? To get to the other side!

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knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are white And Pansies hold hands and skip

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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