mommy mommy! why are we pushing the car over the cliff?! the mom answers shhh youll wake your father...

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Two monkeys are lying in a tree. Big monkey and little monkey, little monkey bites the big monkey's tale, big monkey starts jumping around the place shouting. Little monkey just starts laughing and takes another sip of whiskey.

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What does a camel wear at war? Camelflage

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Because the light was green.

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What was 6 affraid of 7? because 7 was black.

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Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

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Whats the difference between a cow and a sheep a cow goes baa and a sheep goes moo

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What time do you go to the dentist? Depends on the appointment.

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Q:What do you call an insecure person A:Somebody who is likely to commit suicide

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I told my grandmother to act her age.... she then died

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Why did the lion eat food Because seaweed is green

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They didn't stop pulling my hair i didn't stop pulling the trigger

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Whats the difference between a garage full of dead babies and a garage full of money? I don't have a garage full of money

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How do get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.

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Q: Why did the boy not laugh at the Anti Joke? A: Because he has no sense of humor

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Why did Steven Hawking walk into a bar? He didn't he can't walk

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This is not a joke.... It is mind rape.

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What do you call a frog with a bow tie? Cute!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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What would you call Kenny Dalgleish if he was black? Depends on the situation. In a formal environment you would call him Mr Dalgleish, in an informal one it would be acceptable to call him Kenny, Kenneth or just Ken.

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Dog is walking through a park and is almost stepped on by a horse. Dog says, "Hey, watch where you're going!" Horse says, "Well, looky here! A talking dog!"

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Why did the black man go to KFC? Ever since the economic downfall Kentucky Fried Chicken is the only remaining food dispensary in a 5 miles radius.......and hes black

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What's the funniest thing about this website? Everyone thinks their fucking hilarious because they keep making jokes about Sally who has no goddamn arms and little kids with terminal cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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