If Johnny has 5 apples and Susie has 7 apples, will they give them to the homeless?

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What do you call a shoe with no laces? Stilettos, sandals, flip flops, slippers, etc...

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They say laughter is the best medicine but i've always found it hard to laugh at cancer.

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What is worse than Jerry Sanduski? Nothing

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What do You call a man with no arms or legs? Dead, He died of blood loss 3 hours ago

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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What was Helen Keller's favourite colour? None, due her disability she was unable to see colours...

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I brought a parachute as carry on luggage, I was pulled aside at security and missed my flight.

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You mom is to dumb when she herd about Walgreens she thout all the walls were green

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No. Oh don't worry then.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was trying to kill himself in the fastest and easiest way due to his drinking problems, which in the first place separated him him from his wife, who is fighting with him in court for custody of there only child ,Steven. He can not even pay the rent on his apartment or hold a job to pay child support..he is also in debt.

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What's worse then a worm in your apple? When your apples a human

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a Triceratops.

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Why didn't Jane text James? Because she was kidnapped.

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two snow men standing in a field and one says to the other can you smell carrots

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Asexuals aren't known for f***ing around.

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A loving father took his two children to the park for a picnic. while the children went into the lake for a swim he drowned them both

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10+10=20. 20+20=40 40-10=30 I have 2 penises.

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Cancer. Super Cancer.

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how many members of the australian greens party does it take to write legislation? none, it's already been done for them by Karl Marx

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What did the little boy do when he got his test grade? Cried, it was 0

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How do you break up with a guy? you kick him in the nuts.

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Hey babies The holocaust called, they want their screams back.

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Why did the whale rape a guy? He wanted to see what would happen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops