What's funny about a man walking into a bar? He was a clown.

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your mammas so fat tha-- my mother is dead. oh... sorry.

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This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have multiple personality disorder And so do we

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Why was Timmy crying when he got home? His family was dead in a pile with a pitchfork going through each of their bodies

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What did the flower say to it's friends? I want to kill a Christmas tree.

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Why was young Timmy Crying? Unfortunately he had a very rare but serious heart condition and he would probably die within a week.

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why couldnt hellen keller drive a car? because she was a woman

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Man I'm Bored Nice to meet you.

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What's brown and smells like shit? Brown colour. I'm synesthetic.

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France had one revolution

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What did the man say to the woman before he had sex with her? "May I have sex with you, please?"

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A man is hungry so he gets on his coat and shouts : "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!". His wife says not to because the police say the rapist 'Eggman' is out again. He says he will be very careful. On his way he hears 'They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggmen-" and the man shouts: "AND I AM THE WAlRUS, SO GET THE HECK OUTTA MY FACE OR I WILL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" The Eggman and the man found two more people from Liverpool and formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band broke up.

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What did the truck driver get when he ran over my cat? A pave low.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf.

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Q: What does Harry Potter say when he answers the phone? A: "No, she's dead. This is her son."

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Its true... Chuck Norris has no hair on his balls. Because hair doesnt grow on steel.

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Want to hear a joke? Jerry Sandusky's innocence

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked

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How do you kill a pirate? Throw him of a bridge

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What's the difference between 10,000 dead babies and a Farari? I don't have a Farari in my garage.

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I walked up to the door and I asked the door how r u door, and he said, I'm a door!

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Q: Where do you go when its cold? A: A corner because its 90 degrees.

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? rape

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops