What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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Why didn't the man buy the sportscar? He couldn't drive stick

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What's more depressing than watching a worm watching to worms

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I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

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Two Jews, three Nazis, and a black guy go into a bar. Where they have a spirited debate about Canadian football. And leave without coming to any conclusions.

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Why did Rebecca Black die? She killed herself due to the cruelty of many people

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What did the girl say to the mute? "Why are you so quiet?" How did the mute respond? He flipped her off.

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Why did you not just "put a spell" on her instead? And you are totally mean, ever actually killed someone?

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tiger woods played golf against peyton manning and yet tiger still cant win.

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NO I AM NEROCHAN LEFT!

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whats small and sexually confused? YOu

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an orange and an apple are both in a fruit bowl, the apple says nothing as its an apple and apple's cant speak its just an apple

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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True or False : it would not cause a public disturbence to express your P0rnagraphy to the public??? true. P0rnagraphy is the freedom of speech and ability to express oneself

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W. If I was one thing other then a person why would I be? M. The sun. W. Aww, so I brighten your day? M. No, you're just hard to look at.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

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nobody move! I've dropped my brain.

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how do you know your sister is on her period? you dads dick taste like blood.

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Why was a woman crying in a corner of a room She was raped

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Knock knock Who's there? Cow Cow who? If you really think about it, it's really now

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A man named Carl walks into a bar and sees another man named Ed who has purple skin and is holding a chinchilla in one hand and a policeman's helmet in the other. Carl approaches Ed and asks, "Why is your skin purple and why are you holding a chinchilla in one hand and a policeman's helmet in the other?" Ed replies stating, "Well its actually a pretty funny story. I was sailing near cape cod and a saw a large whale jump out of the water, and that gave me a really good idea. So I sailed home immediately and wrote a very detailed novel about my days in Vietnam. The book was a success and I was able to make a large amount of money. However, unfortunately I became addicted to cocaine and wasted all of my money and had to live on the streets. Since then, I have cleaned up my act and am working again and have a house. I decided to treat myself to a night out and so I came here and painted myself purple. Then, I found this chinchilla and policeman's helmet on the floor and decided to hold onto it until I find the owner. Now that I think about it, that story isn't very funny. I apologize." Carl then accepted the apology and the two had a drink together and are still good friends today.

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How do you get a woman out of a car? You drive it into a river and her body will float to the top.

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What's worse than getting stabbed? Getting stabbed twice. What's worse than getting stabbed twice? Getting stabbed three times. What's worse than gettin..... Why does it matter?!?!?! U should be dead by then!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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