What did the Carbon atom say to the Oxygen atom? Nothing, basic elements are incapable of speech. It requires a culmination of many atoms to form a living human capable of speaking to another human.

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Why is it a shame if a kid gets run over by a car? I like the newspaper headlines about stabbings better.

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What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

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a cat a dog and a penis meet up. The cat said ur lucky, when you have to pee u can go wherever you want. the dog said your lucky you can go in a litter box. the penis said your lucky u dont have to put a ballon over your head and do pushups till you throw up!!!

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Why did the Mexican get arrested? Because he crossed the border.

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three blondes are walking along the beach on a desert island, they each have plans to escape. The first swims off the island but is swept in with the current back to land The second blonde burns an SOS into the sand using a rock and twigs-the wind blows it out The third, realising how immature her freinds were, reaches into her pocket and pulls out her mobile phone and begins dialling the coast guard.

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What's blue and rhymes purple? Get Out

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Banana! Banana who? Knock knock! Who's there? Banana! Banana who? Knock knock! Who's there? Orange! Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't stab you 17 times in the kidney?

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's DEAD!

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What is the difference between a person of Mexican heritage and a park bench? One is a bench, the other is a human being.

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Women don't need an education. The only book they need is a recipe book.

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What's more fucked up that the Bill Cosby rape accusations? Sam and Adele's shower time on a Wednesday night

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What the hell are you doing?

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what did the african man have for breakfast? Ebola cereal.

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Did you hear about the new XBOX releasing in Mexico. It's called the XBOX JUAN!!!

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what do u call a turtle with no shell? Larry

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What can you use a broken watch for? A compass.

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What the last thing that went through Osama's mind? A bullet

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how doyou wake up lady gaga youu poke er face

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knock knock whoses there whose home whoses home who? you

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Guy- Wanna hear a joke about my dick? Nah, it's too long. Girl- Wanna hear a joke about my vagina? Nah, you'll never get it.

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What happened when the ugly girl asked her crush out on a date? He said yes. He found her personality quite attractive

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Q:What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A: A pilot you racist jerk...

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how did the ant die? i stepped on it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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