What do you call a three toed 9 foot man. His name.

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A man goes to an amusement park. He heads straight for the roller-coaster and gets in line. When he gets to the front, the ride operator informs him that he is too short to ride. "You must be at least 48 inches, sir, you just barely miss the mark, I'm sorry, I can't let you ride." The man is sad, but he doesn't let this little discrepancy ruin his day. He then gets in line for a different ride.

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Person 1: 'Ask me if I'm a tree' Person 2: 'Are you a tree?' Person 1: 'No.'

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My wife made me a sandwich

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Q: What's blue and smells like baby. A: A choking baby.

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What looks like a chair but isn't? A picture of a chair.

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Ding-Dong.............no knock-knocking required

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A African American male and a Mexican male are both in a car, who is driving? Most likely the owner or the car.

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This would be racist to black people if they could read.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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A potato walked into a bar and ordered a large bowl of french fries

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Two guys walk into A bar. The third one ducks.

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What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. He was stapled to the baby.

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Thats so awesome, I was totally not not going to tell you and when I saw I did not not type it I totally did it anyways, but why did it last even though stuff timed out? I am like so wet.

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Q: What did the farmer say when his tractor broke down? A: oh noo my tractor broke down.

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What do you call a person who drinks beer a lot? Alcohol abuser.

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Why does 1 + 1 = 2? ....seriously P

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So everything, the chat we had before was all you know, a game so I would call you? I am not sleepy but I can wait until you can confirm everything.

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Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

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Your momma is so ugly... Yeah, yeah, yeah my momma's ugly, but guess what, at least I'm not an orphan asshole.

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She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

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shit is shit, even if you paint it purple; its still shit

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If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops