What did the vegetarian order for lunch? A dead baby.

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What's white and looks like paper? Paper.

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How do you stop the neighbors from calling the police when you play your music too loud? Kill them and use their bodies as noise insulation

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Me: What day is it? Rebecca Black: Tuesday

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How do you wake up lady Gaga? You poke her face

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A little boy who was sleeping in his parent's bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't. He said nothing, and the incident troubled him deeply for many years.

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A black guy and a hispanic guy walk into a bar they sit down and happily have a drink CHEESE ON TOAST

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how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

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Q: What was the name of the armless elf in Snow White? A: Stumpy

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Want to hear a Joke? No.

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A man is mowing the lawn. The mower stops, so he reaches down to see if something's stuck in the blades. What does he pull out? His finger.

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Q: why wasn't the fan spinning? A: because it wasn't on. Duh....

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Nobody know he couldn't open it.

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-"Hey! You guys wanna hear a joke" -"What?" -"Womens Rights"

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What did Chuck Norris say to the puppy? Aww what a cute dog.

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Why did the Mexican jump the border? Because his mom told him the grass was always greener on the other side... She lied.

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what do you call a black person who hated fried chicken? a vegetarian.

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How many Jews can you fit inside a car? Legally somewhere between 2 and 9 depending on seat belt availability and passenger space.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? "Get in the car."

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Q: How long does it take to dig to China? A: 5 mins. I hire a bunch of mexicans

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Yeah I am sure nobody understood that one... Just be careful in the future. Besides you are supposed to link your "Moral" to the Solvemedia, I suggest you do not post, until you understand things further, I only suggest, but you know that if you become exposed or a threat towards outstanding forces, you become a threat to us all, to our and your fundation, this will not be tolerated unless your desire is to destroy your on fundation, if so, you risk that the desire of the entire fundation, is to destroy you, something which I of course will allow, as I am the leader, not the boss, I do not create nor enforce rules, only guidelines. Moral the friendly neighborhood R*pist: "being new, is no excuse to risk exposing shadows to the light"

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Why do dyslexic people stink at typing? c k j a h s d i u p q h g n z v m n k b e r t y o f This is why...

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A man in an airport asked me if i wanted my bag to be carry-on. So i said yes.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his dad was a serious alcoholic who refused to go to rehab. Being an alcoholic constantly led to him beating the boy and his mother. Eventually, the boy couldn't handle this anymore, and he committed suicide. Realizing what he had done, the father also committed suicide. The mother is now locked away in a mental hospital, for she couldn't hold grasp of the deaths of her husband, and her son.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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