Q: What starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? A: "Fred is raping your sister with a puck."

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a structure used to support sitting people, the other is a human being native to Mexico.

why did the chicken cross the road? the sudden lack of sidewalk dictated as such.

A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

What's black, white & red all over? A cow in a slaughter house.

Knock knock *open*

why was their a child on the sun? There wasn't he would be incinerated

what"s short , has a tail , and is amazing ? maddy cartwright i lied about the tail!

So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

why did the kid get home from school early cause he was home from school..

What is the difference between the sky and the ocean? They're both blue.

What's worse than a tree getting cut down? This joke.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This is a Poem, your Adopted

How are you doing today? I'm fine...Except for the rape.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? I don't know but you're a sick person even thinking about it.

What did the blind pole vaulter say to the speed skater? Hi, how are you?

Why did the man stop smoking? Because he was shot in the face.

why are crocodiles so angry? because they have a lot of teeth but no tooth brush?

Why doesnt the chicken wear any pants? His pecker is on his head

Nazi jokes are not funny. ANNE FRANKly they're mean! See What i did there?

Jamie stegman liked doodle alot. Yummy he thought to himself as it entered his mouth.

A duck walks into a bar Its theoretical comical universe implodes from the destructive weight of inevitable punchlines and everyone in the bar dies.

How do you get a Mexicans attention? By calling him by his name.

what did Stephen Hawking say to the prositute? nothing, because he has a disability which renders him unable to speak

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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