A seal walks into a club.

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epic win?

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Q: What did one Christmas ornament say to the other? A: I didn't know they could talk. Get me that ornament so I can chat with him!

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A chicken rode into town on a horse named Friday. He was later shot by a dyslexic Russian dinosaur.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im tired Cheese on toast

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What's the difference between a raccoon and a bear? One's a raccoon, the other's a bear.

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Q:What were Helen Keller's dying words? A: Speaking is difficult when you have no way of hearing others. Apart from that, just hours before you die, you become unaware of your surroundings, and have a harder time communicating. Both these problems merged together made it basically impossible for her to speak before death.

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An Irishman walks out of a pub. Just kidding.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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have you seen hellen kellers new treehouse? no well neither has she

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What's black, white and sings the intro theme song for "Thomas the Tank Engine" while tap-dancing? There probably isn't anything that does that.

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How do you stop a car from crashing into a wall? -You can't, you are welcome to try, but please don't.

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A one armed blond is in a tree, how to you get her to come down? You wave to her?

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A horse walks into a bar... The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have testicular cancer........"

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Are you trolling with me? I mean how can you know where I live if you have not even picked up the phone yet? Listen, if you wanted to make me upset, you did it okay? You won, I like you a lot and I would never do such a thing. I understand you being upset Nero, I am so sorry, I never meant nor wanted for this to happen, I hope you can forgive me someday.

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What do you think 3 black men want when the come and knock on your car window? They just want directions.

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What did the scarf say to the hat? Nothing, a scarf can't talk.

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Jesus sacrificed his life to prove that he was immortal. So where does the part where he gets nailed to a stick and beaten the shit out of fit in?

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What's the difference between a duck? An orange.

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Fill in the blank: Hello my name is ___, and today I would like to ask you why you put your real name in the blank? Posted by: BerserkSpoon

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Yo mama's so fat when they asked her if she wanted fries with that she said yes

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What's green, has four legs, and falls out of a tree? A pool table in a tree

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Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

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The awkward moment when Delilah got hit by a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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