What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

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Guess what I was with your mom last night so I wraped her in foil and put her in the oven.

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What did the black man say to the white man? "Hi"

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Jhon is riding his wheelchair, but can't get up the driveway. Lucky a stranger passes by. Jhon: Can you help me please sir? Stranger: No

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Whats Worse then finding a worm in your apple. Finding a real joke on anti-joke.com

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what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

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what's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a trampoline? obviously quite a lot due to the fact that they are two completely different ideas with little to no relation to each other.

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I hate it when people pour my cereal. They don't know how much I want. They don't know my life. They don't know what I've been through.

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A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

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A Mexican man, an American man, and an Italian man go to a bridge. The mexican said "we have too much of this in our country!" and throws pasta into the water. The Mexican man says "we have to much of this in out country!" and throws a taco into the water. The American throws in the Mexican man and says "we have to much of these in our country!"

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Have you seen Hellen Keller's treehouse? No. It's quite nice, her father made it himself.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

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Why didn't the vampire go to the Garlic festival? Because it sucks.

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what do u do if a women serves you lunch in the living room? u tighten the chain!!!!!!

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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Q: What is Fftp poort grtz gruxxyw? A: DYSLEXIA!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by jimmy savile.

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Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. I slipped you a roofie, get ready for me.

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow.

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whats worse then being a jew now? being a jew in 1942

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Why do fat people make such good slaves? They're too fat and lazy to escape. Unfortunately, if you want your slave to be fat, you actually have to feed it properly.

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Why didn't the black man make it into heaven? No one did, there is no evidence supporting the existence of an afterlife.

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Saggy Nipples By chan chan

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whats worst then dieng in a videogame

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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