Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

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A White guy invites his Black friends into his house, he says "Make yourself at home." THEY DO

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Q: What drug did the addict do at the Grand Canyon? A: None; after years of battling substance abuse, he came to realize the social, financial, and health consequences had significantly degraded his quality of life, and was appalled by his bad decisions.

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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A man was driving and texting at the same time and when he was not looking a car passed him on the other side of the road. The man driving the car that passed the man was talking on the phone. When the man txting looked up and look back and said thank god thats not me talking i could of crashed if i was him

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What do you call a big hungry duck? A duck thats hungry and big

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What was so sad about the white woman who dropped her Starbucks? It fell on her baby in a nearby stroller giving it third degree burns, disfiguring its face.

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What's worse than homework? A basket full of mutilated puppies....

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What did the cow say to the horse? Mooo

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what does a deer and grass have in common? they are both green but i lied about the deer

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I was jaywalking when it hit me. You know, a car.

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How to make deep fried chicken. Step 1: Go to your local swimming pool. Step 2: Throw a dead chicken into the deep end. Step 3: Strike the chicken with lightning. Step 4: Remove your newly fried chicken. Enjoy!

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a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

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Q: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: The pizza does not scream in the oven.

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knock , knock That Was The Same Mistake That Ann Frank Made.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Nothing.

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Your dad is so gay, he lovingly marries another man and selflessly adopts you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has an abusive farmer and needs to get away before it gets any worse.

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River Ravi flows in which state? Liquid state.

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Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

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Your momma's so fat: She regrets not making the most of her youth whilst she was still attractive.

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Siri, what is your definition of love? "Let me check on that...Here's what I've found." Google.com search = definition of love

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do you no what im doing? writing this joke.

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What's the Green Lantern's favorite holiday? Hannukah

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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