How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

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Remember IRON MAN 3! Subscribe to www.prettypleasehelpmeforgethatpieceofshitmovie.com

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Why did the Girl fall of the swing? She had no arms Knock Knock Who's There? Not That Girl

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Whats green? Mountain Dew.

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Knock Knock .....................Oh it was just the TV

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem about Red rosses and blue violets

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why was the movie rated PG 13? mild violence and sexual content

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Kitana vs Shao Kahn. Kitana: HIAHIAHIAHIA...etc Kahn: You weak pathetic whor... OARGH! Kahn: FINISH ME!!! Kitana: Dad? Again? Okay the last time then... Kahn: I just addopted you you FUC... Oargh Oargh Oargh Oargh Oargh... OOF!! OFF!! OFF!! OFF! Kitana: *slurp okay no more for you I am uh... full, seriously, Ill explode or some other Fatality... Woody Allenality... Kahn: Kontinue? (press start to kontinue free play mode)

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What's funny about Antijokes.com? Everything

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Your mum is so dead, when I kick her she doesn't move.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Bob Hi bob, come inside. And next time just use the doorbell

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A blind man jumped out of the way as a car ran through the red light at a one way street.

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How do you tell if your boyfriend is gay? He is having sex with men

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How did the dyslexic, purple horse commit suicide? It jumped off the Grand Canyon.

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What do you call a man that likes to play baseball? A Baseball Player.

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Why was the boy upset? His penis fell off and his mom was making him go to the library.

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When life gives you limes....... first you have some problem and second u throw them at people

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Why did the bartender leave the bar? He worked really long hours and finally needed some time to sleep.

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Why couldn't the boy watch the R-rated movie? Cuz he was blind.

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What time did the Chinese man go the dentist? About 5 minutes prior to his appointment

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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So, two people park their car and walk into a bar. Wait, no. They were walking into a grocery store and they were riding skateboards, not a car. Then, the kid walks in after them. Oh, did I forget to mention they had children? And also, they're married. So anyway, they walk into this grocery store, and meet a barkeep. Wait no that's ridiculous why would a barkeep be in a grocery store. Let me start over. Bah.. never mind. I forgot what happened next, but it was REALLY FUNNY!

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What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves? Reeves Christopher

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Three men walked into a bar. None were injured because they were all wearing hard hats as is the procedure for a construction site.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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