roses are red violets are blue What smells like poo? Your waffle's blue

Kid 1: Hey, guess what? Kid 2: Your MOM! HAHA! Kid 1:... My mother died two months ago from brain cancer after being shot in the head while fighting for our country in Iraq... Kid 2:.... um.. Your mom...?

why did jonathan not get any presents for the holiday?because it was the 4th of July

it's easy to take part, just type your text below!

Mr. Wonder, optimism is seeing the glass as half full, pessimism as seeing the glass half empty, and realism as not seeing the glass at all.

a ginger named corey walks into a bad and gets pistol whipped after raping his classmate

Why did the maid clean the house? Because that's her job, ya moron.

Elvis presley was taking a poop and couldnt poop cause he was dead.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

a dyslexic man walks into a bra and realizes he is quite lucky as another man walks into a large steel pole

Whats worst than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. Whats worst than a pile of dead babies? One live baby under the pile of dead babies.

HOLY SHIT!!!!

Q.Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A.Because chickens weren't invented then.

What you you call peanut butter on the top of a dog house Peanut butter

Knock knock Who's there Why? Why who? Why so serious?

What if the rest of you value something wrong?

nobody move! I've dropped my brain.

What's the best part of the 1980s? They're over.

what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

Q: Where was Moses when the lights went out. A: In the dark.

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

Q: Why was the child sad? A: because a doctor was taking bullet fragments out of his chest.

hey I just met you, and this is crazy. I have alzheimers. Hey i just met you.

whats long, orange, and comes out of brown stuff? -a carrot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...