Sidney Crosby comes face-to-face with Alex Ovechkin. The Penguins were playing the Capitals.

A hat fell into the Indian Ocean. What happened to the hat? It got wet

A snail walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "hey we don't serve snails here," and flicks him across the street. 3 years later the snails walks back into the bar and said, "why'd ya do that for??"

what did the pregnant women get? A miscarriage

Q: What's worse than getting a divorce? A: I don't know, i'm still married.

What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

Whay is jerry so bad at parallel parking? He just got a sex change yesterday.

roses are blue violets are green I am colorblind

Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

Whats invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts

A guy was beet by his wife.

What do you call a smart blond? There aren't any so there shouldn't be a name for it.

What happens when a blond walks into a bar She buys a drink

What's the difference between a smart blonde and bigfoot? There's been sittings of bigfoot

What did the Asian man say to the Mexican man? Nothing, due to the language barrier.

Why did the girl have twins she was raped

What does a carrot and a potato have in common? They're both not chocolate

your mama so fat she has a low self esteem

why did sally fall off the swing? because she was a fish.

If your uncle jack helped you off your horse, would you help your uncle jack off a horse? Yes

What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

Q: Who wants a chick with big breasts? A: Everyone apparently, because chickens are being genetically engineered that way because people are racist about what part of the chicken then want to eat. The white meat or the dark meat. Guess what? Now they can't walk because they are top heavy. And who's fault is that? The people who only eat the white meat.

There was a farmer had a dog and Bingo was his name-oh But the farmer killed and ate him, because Bingo licked himself inappropriately

A priest and rabbi walk into a bar, they order a few drinks, then call a cab to go home.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...