In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

A man walks into a bar. It was a salad bar, so he left.

did you know why people keep saying "you know...you know..." in their conversation? well i don't know

My penis is so big that some women find it uncomfortable.

A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we've got a drink named after you!". The grasshopper turns and says "You've got a drink named Steve?"

Knock, knock Who's there? Man Man who? The man who is knocking. Now open the door Carl!

whats brown and fluffy? brown fluff

Yo mama is so poor I saw her kicking a can down the street and asked her what she was doing? Her reply was: Kicking a can down the street. What did you think she was doing? Moving?

5 little monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "He has a mild concussion."

Buzi vagy!

How do you make a baby cry Throw a brick at its face

whats worse than 100 babies strapped to an atomic bomb? 1 baby strapped to 100 atomic bombs

-Look! Up in the sky! -It's a bird! -Yep.

My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

Knock Knock. Who's there *gun shot*

Why did the fish cross the road? Because the chicken was carrying an aquarium.

What happenes if you put an elephant in the fridge? Nothing, it wouldnt fit.

What is worse than writing a really terrible joke on anti-joke.com? Death.

Whats the difference between a quarter and a penny? 24 cents.

Q.Why did the boy fail to complete his homework? A. He was a loaf of bread

A blind man walks into a bar. He cannot read the drink menu.

Two mice fell into a bucket of cream. They both promptly drowned.

What do you call a gay Chinese math teacher? A gay Chinese math teacher.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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