A Man walks into a bar and asks for a shot. The Bartender proceeds to unload a 30 round banana clip into his head, neck, and midsection.

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You all have Aids

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A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father ****s on his desk.

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knock knock whos there rock rock who rocks dont knock stupid

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Why did the young boy lose a testicle? Because he was viciously raped by a large parrot

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knock! knock! Whos there? Chris Hansen..

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How do you make a little girl cry?

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Why did the chicken was the boat see the genie yes but dog said meow? Last night when you were sleeping, I took a dump in your shoes and used your toothbrush to wipe my butt. Then I took your wallet and flushed down the toilet.

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What's worse than being shot? Being shot twice.

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What did the hispanic say to the black guy? I'm not sure. I wasn't listening because eavesdropping is rude.

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What's the difference between a trampoline and a dead baby? I take my cleats off when I jump on the trampoline

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Why was Timmy sad? He had 15 large cuban men slapping him for 27 hours straight.

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what did the african man have for breakfast? Ebola cereal.

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What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in circle.

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What's worse than being short? Being a Tutsi in 1994.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Jim. Jim who? Jim your cousin. Kathy then let Jim inside her house and helped him carry the pizza boxes into the kitchen. Everyone had fun and enjoyed the party very much that night.

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Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

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How many Ethiopian's can you fit in a bathtub? As many as you want, they'd all fall down the drain. JimBoto

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Q: What did the blind boy get for his birthday? A: He doesn't know

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H20" and the second one says, "I'll have some H20 too." The second scientist dies after drinking hydrogen peroxide.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown There is crap in my garden

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today at school... I learned about all the core subject plus the additional electives.

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Whats more realistic than evolution? Everything

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What do you call a doctor whos black A doctor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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