Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Oh na na not today Oh na na maybe tommrow

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Obama walks into a hospital....

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Two Jews walk into a bar. They promptly order their drinks and leave.

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Two black men and a latino board a plane together. They are members of the Marshall High School football team, and all die in the subsequent crash.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Joe Bereta is a member of al Qaeda.

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What is pink and fuzzy? Pink fuzz

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knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing, fruit can't talk.

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What's the worst part about eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheel chair.

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How do you kill Chuck Norris. Shoot him in the face

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when life givs you lemons, make lesbian porn

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A guy walks into a bar and doesn't buy a 12 pack of coke, pepsi is better but he didn't have enough money to buy either.

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Why Did Suzie fall of the swing? She has Polio and will die the Next Day

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What did Santa give little Susie for Christmas? Nothing, he raped her.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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What Batman Said to Robin before getting into the car? I'll drive.

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Martin Skrtel walks into a bar The bar breaks, Martin then pays for any damages caused

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Heil Hitler!!!!!! Why thankyou General Himmler. Would you care to join me for supper this evening?

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why did the blond get and abortion? because she was forcefully raped by her 42 year old boy friend and felt she could not raise a child on her own.

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what did one tornado say to the other? im dizzy

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KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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