- Anti Joke

there is a blonde, red head, and brunet held captive in afghanistan. The people say whats your last word to the red head, she says tornado... they turned and she escaped, they say to the brunet what is your last word, she says tsunami.. they turn and she escaped. They go to the blonde and say what is your last word, she says fire... she is then shot rapidly and she dies.

Why couldn't the blind man drive? His sight impairment made him unable to fulfill the task without harming himself and potentially other people.

So a deaf man is listening to the radio.

What did the girl with no arms get for Christmas? A long sleeve shirt

Knock knock. Who's there? Gestapo. Gestapo who? Your husband is dead.

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

Barack Obama, Mother Teresa and Stephen Hawkings had race. Who won? Barack Obama. This deduction can be made as Stephen Hawking is severely disabled by a motor neurone disease known as amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. Henceforth, he has very limited control over the majority of his body and is confined to a electric wheel chair. Thus, he could not participate competitively in the race. Moreover, Mother Teresa is dead. This unfortunate occurrence was caused by several myocardial infarctions in combination with pneumonia. Regardless of this, Mother Teresa's meek and frail build would slower her speed considerably; in comparison to Barack Obama's relatively athletic and robust frame. Nonetheless, President Obama is a smoker. Therefore, he may experience symptoms associated with emphysema during the race, causing him to retire. As such no-one would finish the race, leaving the spectators feeling very disappointed and empty.

why did the chickan cross the road? who let the chickan out?

So like i was like 3 and I was like stupid or something I was only three, come on! three

So, there was two successful business men at a social gathering when one leans in to the other to comment, "Hey, that women over there, she looks like your wife!" to which the other one replies, "That is my wife."

Why didn't the Hispanic man get elected? Because his policies were unpopular.

what did the scene kid get for christmas? a gift card which he used ironically.

1 + 1 ? Hmm, I don't know, maybe 2 but I could be wrong.

whats black and white and red all over? ...a nun in a blender

What did the Blind man say to the deaf man? Nothing, he doesn't know sign language

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i am in sex mode, why the F**k are you!!

what do you call a man who is addicted to alcohol... an alcoholic

Paul Walker: Breaks, stop Breaks: No

Did you hear about the comedian cereal killer?...He raped his victims before strangling them to death.

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because 7, 8, 9

What do you call a black man stealing your tv? A thief

What's big, white, and when it falls out of a tree, it can kill you? A refrigerator.

what is blue purple and has wings what i dont know that why i am asking you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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