"Knock knock." "No."

Why did the muslim cross the road? To get to the other Saiid.

Why cant t-rexes clap their hands? They no longer exist

What's worse than getting a fly stuck up your nose? Been alone in a hospital room with Jimmy Saville.

Winter

An asian, mexican, and a black guy walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "get the hell out"

A boy with cancer decides to go skydiving for his 18th bithday. Unfortunately, his parchute doesn't work & he dies before he hits the ground.

what has two eyes and a face? the 5 year old who got raped on his way back home last night.

Why did the racecar driver lose his driver's license? He crashed into an orphanage.

Once upon a time, there was a a loving couple. When they first kissed, the girl's heart skipped a beat, but it wasn't because of love. It was a heart murmur. She died. The end.

Why did the ginger cross the road? To tell the police that her family had been taken hostage.

a boy put a blanket oveer his head one night... He was warm for the rest of the night

Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

How old is your mom Dead

What do you call a paralyzed man on a fishing boat? Robert

Q: What did the teacher say at the end of recess. A: "Recess is over."

why do gingers have no friends? They are non sentient stems that are simply not capable of interacting with intellectual humans

What colour is a black man in a freezer black

why is my phone broken i dropped it

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

What's the only think duct tape can't fix? Your parents divorce.

Why don't people say YOLO anymore? They all died in car crashes while texting and driving.

A blonde walks into a bar a uses the restroom. She needed to pee.

Why did Tim sit on the chair? Because potato.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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