Roses are red violets are blue you better run I see you

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Redcunt? You got to try being nicer if you want a proper answer

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What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

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How do you torture Helen Keller? You put her on a table and slowly pull her limbs off

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What is worse then finding an apple in your worm? Not a lot.

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an ethopian thanksgiving

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-Why did the man sue the train driver after he witnessed his friends death? -Because he was owed a duty of care.

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what happened when a chicken laid an egg? it died

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do you have a pen i can borrow? yeah, here.

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If life throws you lemons, throw them back and ask for some water because lemonade only makes you thirstier due to the large amounts of sugar used.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I forgot.

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Why was the lady afraid of cooking? Because her husband always beat her with a frying pan

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Why didn't the door open? Because it was locked

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An American and Russian are arguing about their country. The American says "I can do things you can't. I can walk into the White House and into the Oval Office. I can bang my hands on my President's desk and say "Mr. Obama, I don't like the way you're running your country." The Russian says, "I can do that." The American says, "No, you can't." The Russian says, "Sure I can. I can go to Vladimir Putin's office and say "Mr. President, I don't like the way Mr. Obama's running his country."

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What starts with the letter P and ends with 'orn'? Porn....

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im jackson, i have a small willy, and like to finger my dog

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chuck norris's daughter lost her virginity but he got it back

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what did the boy with cancer get for Christmas a pair of shoes

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If chuck noris has five dollars and you have five dollars, he has more money than you. He forgot about the extra dollar in his back pocket

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Q: How Do You Stop a Bus? A: Pull the Brakes so it comes to a absolute stop.

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Yo mama so fat, she should see a doctor to discuss healthier lifestyles.

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"Hello, is this the Krusty Krab?" "No, this is Patrick."

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If there's something strange in the neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police, because it's obviously a darky that's up to no good.

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Why did the giant frog attack the party goers with a ballistic missile? oh where tos tart...it's, just such a long story, I don't really know where to begin, in fact it's probably better if you just take my word for it, no need to go into details. we just don't have time for that now.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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