What came first -- the chicken or the egg roll?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

thumb_up thumb_down -20

charlie sheen becomes sober.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the black man get for Christmas? Presents

thumb_up thumb_down -20

'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q: what is the most confusing day in the ghetto? A: fathers Day

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A guy walks into a bar with a Donkey and a jar full of pennies. He walks up to the bartender and orders ten shots of whiskey. He was found dead the next morning from erotic asphyxiation.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you call an apple in a washing machine? My lunch!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Fire is red Water is blue Earth is brown Air is transparent

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's the difference between a tigar and a shark? One's a land mammal.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q: Why did the purple cantalope eat the curtains at midnight? A: Sassafrass.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did they use the phone as a football? Because it was a phone-ball.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

There was once a guy who was so crazy...he was sectioned.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock knock What?

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Yo momma's so fat that she's gotta get a special door that will allow her to get through.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The first is a person of the Jewish Faith and the other is a popular item of food.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set a firework off on her face.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Yolo is for losers, I have 9 lives...meow

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the man do when he found a lost dog in his yard? He shot it. This was a very old, lonely, and distressed man with many unresolved problems resulting from his childhood in poverty.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A black man,a Hispanic man, and a white man are in a race. The white man wins because he took steroids and used somebody else's urine for the drug test.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was at a crosswalk and the walk light was on.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Nope, but yeah Felix looks a lot like Mickey Mouse, I think, nah it was Oswald the Lucky rabbit I believe, and he used to get his ass kicked by... Damn, what`s the name of the fat cat that beat up Mickey in steamboat willie?

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops