Q: why is halloween scary? A: because your there!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call 1,000 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A horrible boating accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

SHE GOT A BIG BOOTY SO I CALL HER by her real name because she is a woman and worthy of my respect.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the road was clear of oncoming traffic.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red my underwear is brown I just sharted my pants

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him, "Would you like a drink?". The horse cannot understand english and is confused by its surroundings. The horse gallops out of the bar knocking over a few stools

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between Micheal Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Micheal Jackson has never been on the moon, Neil Armstrong never had plastic surgery and Micheal was a pop star.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do Bruce Lee and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both dead

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Three women are sitting in a bar. One is drinking beer, one is drinking wine and one is drinking vodka. Which one is the widow? The one whose husband is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

One day a man woke up and decided that he was going to do something with his life. He then got a haircut, took a shower and bought a nice new suit. After that he went home and cleaned up his whole house and invited his parents, that were not very close with him, over for dinner.An hour and thirty minutes before his parents got there, he went to the store to pick up some food to prepare for the very important dinner. On the way home he see's a homeless man walking on the side of the road. The man felt bad for him because he was poor so he gave him $10. He then proceeded home to make the dinner. The dinner turned out very well and he went to bed a better man.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What would happen if an asian guy and a black guy had a baby? Nothing. It is impossible for a baby to be born since men produce sperm cells not egg cells and for a fetus to form, you need an egg and a sperm, so you would need a male and a female so since they are both men it is physically impossible for them to produce a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

You have Aids. April fools! you have super Aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between a Jew and a Muslim? -You can research and find several similarities and differences, but I will not go into detail about them.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What can u see in the dark that u can't see in the light? Absolutely nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Church.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's red, fast, and flies through the air? A tomato in a plane.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walked into a bar. He got a head trauma and committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the blondes left leg say to her right leg? Nothing they haven't met yet.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

roses are red violets are blue last time i dropped something this hard it ended world war 2?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do grizzly bears and people have in common? Neither can survive in outer space, due to depressurization, lack of oxygen, and absence of basic survival needs.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock-knock. Who's there? Doorbell repairman. ym

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your mama's so stupid because she has down syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the black man say to the white man standing next to him? Hi

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I have a dig bick you that read wrong you read that wrong too.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops