whats the difference between a fat person and a skinny person ? there weight.

What did bob order at pizza hut? Pizza

What did the tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

A priest a rabbi and the dalai lama walk into a bar. They decided to order the hotwings...... Why do u care??? : )

hey! Wanna hear a bird joke? No. Well this is Hawkward....

Knock knock. Who's there? Pete. I'm here to tell you that your entire family just died in a car accident.

Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

Why doesn't the South Pole war veteran remember the name of his child? He is a penguin and could care less about naming his children. Why doesn't the penguin on the North Pole remember the name of his child? There are no penguins on the North Pole.

vaginas are pretty!!!!

If Abraham Lincoln were alive today, he'd be really really old.

what did Sandra bullock say to Jesse James? I hate your fickin a**!!:)

What do you call shark with no dorsal fin? Unused ingredients for soup.

hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

Q: What is the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "robin get in the car"

What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk, idiot.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the poll booth to vote on a law restricting the questioning of chickens destination and furthermore to let chickens cross with out ridicule.

Winter

How do you get a one armed man out of a tree? you throw a fridge at him

Annld so the penguin said, "This is my most casual outfit!"

What was Tyler's last name? Grzesik.

Joe used to always talk about his family and his two wonderful kids Joe can no longer talk to or about his family because his smoking habits have gotten out of control

what did the egg say to the boiling water? itll take a while to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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