shammmm is a lesbian.

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How many times has Susie fallen off the swing? Not enough.

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Why did the Police Officer pull over the black man? The black man was not following the rules of the road and accepted the ticket with great remorse. The Officer then proceed to pull over a white man for this very same offence.

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Knock knock (who's there) Orange ( orange who) orange you glad to see

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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My mother forgot to make me a sandwich today.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar.

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What do you say to a black man with a gun? Don't shoot me.

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How do you make a sandwich? You don't, you have a girl do it for you.

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What is brown and woody? Brown wood.

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There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. So now he's dead. No more eating of shoes.

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What happened to the dog who lost its legs? It Died.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. and Asians are yellow.

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You ask a German how long it takes to go from Berlin to Amsterdam. He replies, ''About four hours by tank."

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On monday morning the doctor walked into a patient's room, then he walked out after a quick check up.

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Have you ever tasted Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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Two fish were lying on a bank. One said "I can't breath." The other one was dead.

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Whats worse then getting AIDS Math class

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Why did the horse go to the doctor? It had a heart disease.

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What has eight legs and one eye? Two chairs and half a pigs face.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things, because a dead baby isn't funny at all.

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So, two people park their car and walk into a bar. Wait, no. They were walking into a grocery store and they were riding skateboards, not a car. Then, the kid walks in after them. Oh, did I forget to mention they had children? And also, they're married. So anyway, they walk into this grocery store, and meet a barkeep. Wait no that's ridiculous why would a barkeep be in a grocery store. Let me start over. Bah.. never mind. I forgot what happened next, but it was REALLY FUNNY!

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He was shot. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He was mentally disturbed. Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure

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knock knock who's there BANG!! BANG!! BANG!! BANG!! who OPEN THE DOOR ITS THE POLICE

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops