How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

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Have you ever noticed how those little packets of sweetner are really handy to have around when you like your coffee to be sweeter than its default bitterness?

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If Chuck Norris had five dollars and YOU had five dollars, he could still punch you in the face for free and get ten dollars out of it.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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I'm a poet and I didn't even realize I was one

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How do you get a clown off of a swing? Hit him with an ax.

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A Terrorist walks into an airport. - He then blows himself up.

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A blind man walks into a bar. I mean a fence.

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Q: What did the passengers think of thier Chineese bus driver? A: They were very pleased with the bus driver's service, for he was a very safe driver and got them to their destination on time.

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Roses are blue Violets are green I have issues, What should I do?

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed 1 fell off and broke it's skull. Momma told the doctor and the doctor said,"Your a bad mom."

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happy birthday! Its not my birthday! Oh i just assumed from your smell. That doesn't make much sense does it? It does. No it doesnt. Are you sure? Yes. Oh. Do i smell? Like chickens. Oh. I wish i were alive. What? Bobbing for apples? what? You smell like a toilet seat. Fine! You never spend time with me any more! I dont like you! oh. you know who nobody likes? Who? amanda burchell.

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do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

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Hi

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Your mother is so overweight that she decided to have liposuction and then proceeded to live a wonderful life.

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Why did the Mexican get arrested? Because he crossed the border.

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Why couldn't the man see the camoflague iguana He could.

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Knock Knock Whos there? The Police, your mother just died of bowel cancer.

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Q: Whats the difference between a Jewish man and a pizza? A: Jew's are humans and can feel emotions, as for pizza's can not feel emotions, because they are pizzas.

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What kind of a prediction is THAT?

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Why did the little pig squeal? Because he was going through blades at a slaughter house.

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A priest, a minister and a rabbit were seated next to each other on an airplane. They all had to pay for lunch.

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How do you make a clown cry? Kill his family

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What did the black man say to the white man standing next to him? Hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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